Tuesday, July 04, 2006

A Country Boy's View on Fashion


I still cant understand it. After all these years, I cant make a lick of sense out of what folks consider to be in or out of fashion appropriate or inappropriate attire or appearance. What was in last year, might be out this year or it might be in but you need to change what you wear with it. What was OK for spring and summer probably wont work well for fall and winter - weather considerations aside. And what is in was likely already in somewhere around 20 or so years ago but then it went out so something else could be in. And why dont they just come right out and say FAKE fur instead of trying to dress it up with a fancy foreign word?

Thank God for jeans

I gotta find the Fashion Holy Book. I know there has to be one out there somewhere that says that its a sin to wear the same thing as you wore last year. Or maybe its just sometimes that its a sin. I dunno. All I know is that the ladies section has to be really big. Like maybe everything but the last seven pages. Guys dont seem to matter quite as much. Its sort of like an afterthought thing just so we wouldnt be offended. They whoever they is could have left us out completely for all I care.

Thank God for jeans

I cant understand it. Why sometimes looking layered is good and sometimes it isnt. Why sometimes croc (apparently they couldnt spell the entire word) is good and sometimes it isnt. Why big old-looking broaches are sometimes good and sometimes they arent. And why anyone would ever frown on micro-minis is beyond me. OK, so Im I guy. Ill let that one go.

Thank God for jeans

And how can pleats be in or out? What about tweed? Is it good or not? Why do ladies handbags need to match their shoes? Can summer shoes be the same as winter shoes? Probably not, huh? And whats wrong with tie dye for cryin out loud? Looks cool to me. And whats the deal with buying jeans brand new, mind you - that look like theyve already been worn for two years? I never have been able to figure out that one.

But yeah, thank God for jeans

I cant understand it. Are guys dress jackets now supposed to have two, three or four buttons? Are pleated dress pants in or out? What about casual slacks? Cuffs yes or no? Tuck or dont tuck? Why cant neckties be any width we dang well want? And why do we even wear the silly things in the first place? Why is it important for all the men to look like penguins when they dress for formal occasions? A zebra look makes just as much sense to me.

Thank God for jeans

And have you looked at underwear lately? (Do I need to rephrase that?) Now I understand that the ladies like to do all sorts of push up, push out, accent, emphasize, enhancement stuff. But guys were getting out of control! Holy smokes. I thought the intent of our under-layer was to keep our goodies in place and prevent excessive scuffing against whatever outer-layer we happened to be wearing. Ive even seen articles describing what kinds of underwear the celebrities are wearing. Why would we care? Im just not understanding any of this.

Thank God for jeans and good old briefs

I guess I never will comprehend any of this fashion in style stuff. Seems to me that if were clean and comfortable including warm, cool or dry depending on the weather were good to go. I just cant see that anything else matters much. Of course, Im just an old country boy. What do I know?